And part of it comes from my guilt….
DH and I just had a huge fight and I left to go for a drive to get some of my emotions under control. In a nutshell, I’m not doing enough around here. He finally asked me what it is I do all day because all he sees is me watching tv or playing on my computer.
He just got done working on our roof. He’s been at it all day without a break. I sat inside all day and watched CSI, except when I went to Target to pick up diapers, wipes, and toilet paper and stopped by my mom’s because she was going through baby withdrawal.
To be fair, he does get up 90% of the time during the night and changes Justin’s diapers and burps him after I nurse or in between nursings as it sometimes happens.
It’s been almost four weeks since I gave birth and my body is still very sore. It hurts to stand for more than a couple of minutes and it hurts to sit in the same position for too long. I’ve talked to family members and to the midwives and this is normal. Even though I’ve never had this slow of a recovery time, this is perfectly normal.
Everyone tells me to focus on nursing and relaxing. Don’t worry about the house or anything else.
That’s not an option for me. DH wants the house on the market in a week and a half. The house is a disaster from the renovations and the baby showers. There is crap everywhere that needs to be sorted and put away or stored. I try to spend 15 minutes on it every day, but what little I get done gets messed up by the end of the night when DH puts stuff in the nearest open space. This timeline he’s set is unrealistic but he’s set that we either meet this deadline or we have to refinance this house and be here for another year or two.
And since I haven’t been doing anything to help out, I need to step it up now.
I’m going to try to get online at least once every day, but I may not be commenting or saying much for the next few days.